feeling of confusion, when your thoughts are too heavy to allow your body movement. when the world beneath your feet is slowly sinking you under. the feeling of uncertainty, he said she said. the days you want to crawl into a ball on your bed and sleep until your dreams are convincing. when you meet someone who changes it all, but to him its an illusion. when hes gone through it all, and you? youre nothing. when you want to say so much, but there goes the ground sucking you into the core. the feeling of wanting more. the what ifs the what nows the when where and hows. i dont know where im going with this.
ive been so confused…..i have no idea where the wind is taking my sail, fuck it might as well enjoy the view.
even if theyre miles away from where you are, and days have passed since seeing them, theyre in your heart, thats it. love doesnt have rules or limits or requirements. i think thats what makes it so undeniable..
i miss you every single day and if god were to grant me a day without rain id take advantage of it. your laugh id bask in it. your eyes id dance in them. without you life has no answer to it. and if the drought brought me to parchness, your fountain id drink from. id pick every star that lingered in my view, and dared to be as a bright as you. id let the day fall to tears, because its not fair the way you have me here. and if there ever was a chance id get to say my apologies, i would take it in a heart beat. and if i had a better way of expressing my devotion to you id write it in a better form. i wish i can explain how much i love you…..cause i love you more than i love myself.
im the most jealous person i have ever come across. its insane. and it has noting to do with being greedy selfish or insecure. i just like whats mine to be mine. i guess i dont like being second. i dont even know.
favorite author.
im on vacation until sunday. im staying in a hotel room, that looks like a fucking apartment. weve got two master bedrooms, living room, full kitchen, three bathrooms, and a dining room. not to mention the balcony over looking the (insert city here) beach that i get to watch the sunrise peak over every morning at 6 am. its pretty awesome i cant complain…theres a pier and everything. maybe gonna do some night fishing.
